Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Pregnancy Update - 11 Days To Go

There is a reason I have not been blogging....what could that be? This pregnancy as I have stated many times has been dramatically different then the first from the start with dehydration, weight loss problems, lots of sinus infections, a bout of depression, butts in rib cages, walking issues and finally the newest issue is.....pneumonia!

Monday my son came home after I went to the doctor and had a cough. The next morning I woke up to a sore throat so I called the doctor and asked what to take to which they said it was allergies so take Zyrtec and Robitussin because I was already on nasal spray. Wednesday I went to work at the call center I laid my head down because it was pounding and I generally felt bad. I had a hoodie on my team leader and a couple of older ladies began to talk about me because they thought I was sleeping. Little did they know that I was not. The comments of "If she thinks it's okay to sleep she shouldn't be on morning shift," "She is probably faking she isn't as sick as she said or she wouldn't be here," and "She thinks she is special because she is pregnant," were enough to make me way to angry. Not like it does any good. I went thru the last couple of hours and then came home. My cough was getting worse and my brother told me that he didn't think it was an allergy cough and I started to believe he was right. I woke up at 12:30am to a bad coughing case and called into work. By the next morning I had a rattle in my chest and so I made a doctors appointment because I knew I needed a doctors excuse. I assumed I had a bad case of bronchitis or pleurisy like I had at the beginning of the pregnancy. The doctor listened to my lungs to which he said, "Well that sounds interesting!" He sent me over to the hospital to get a chest x-ray. I called them back 30 minutes before the office closed to find out if I was going to have to work only to be told that I needed to come to the hospital to be admitted because I had pneumonia. I was stunned and I also felt validated because the women at work was proved wrong I was actually sicker then even I expected. I went into the hospital on Thursday and was released Saturday but I am officially on leave until after I have the baby. My side feels like someone punched me about 10 times, but I don't have a cough. I still get short of breath which they have me on a inhaler as well. They tell me it doesn't go away over night but it will get better with time.

On other news my nephew Brayden is doing wonderful. He is gaining weight, has 2 teeth, took 2 steps, and is getting ready to tried starting on a sippy cup. He still has to get tube feedings but I am more then confident in his foster family. I am still a backup if they have issue with the dads family I am working on being approved as a family placement but the foster family really wants to adopt and I think that it is a wonderful idea and I am not being kept away from this nephew so I am happy by the outcome. Here is hoping my sister doesn't get up and fuck everything up for this little boy because she thinks she is what is best. Sometimes one has to step back and see thing objectively.

I am back in school as well. I started classes on the the 6th of this month. I am working on my Bachelor of Science in Information Technology with a specialization in Web Development. Something that allows me to do something I like. I want to focus on Mobile App Design but I also hope to be able to create Blog Designs for mommy bloggers like myself. I won't graduate till May 2016 tho but I am confident that I will graduate this time...if not for me then for my kids because I hate the mundane job I am currently at.

I am single now as well. It ended because of mutual mistakes as well as no communication between us. We have had lots of fights since we broke up....actually we have fought more since we have been split up then we did while we were together. His mother posted on facebook that the next 18 years would be hell, and also twisted my words to make it sound like I said he wasn't going to be the father. Which considering he and I were NEVER apart during the time I got pregnant it is a little aggravating because now there is that doubt with people that she isn't his. It's weird how dealing with black people and white people are so different. PJ asked one time during the whole pregnancy with Xay if he was the father. His family never questioned it. Be it whatever my daughter will come out and take his last name as a second middle name and my last name. 

11 days to go and I have given my daughter an eviction notice. I am tired of being pregnant. She is due on April 26th but my bet is on April 19th....maybe if I am lucky.

Here is my maternity pictures for this pregnancies which were taken at around 31 weeks :)

Thursday, January 30, 2014

Bad Situations....

I have a dark cloud that has taken up residence over my house the last 6 days.

Bad Situation #1
You see it all started on Monday when we woke up to no water. We threw the electric heater under the and thawed out the frozen line only to find that it was leaking so we had to turn the water off to be fixed. Tuesday the water froze up at the meter so we couldn't do anything till the water company came to thaw it out....still no water tho. We didn't want to fix the pipe at this point till we had water to check it. So Wednesday came the landlord dropped the heater off to thaw the pipes because we assumed that it was frozen somewhere under the house since the water company had already thawed the meter. WRONG. Then today we got the water company to unthaw the meter for the second time...got water flowing back to the house....go the one leak fixed.....only to find out that we got one if not two more potentially busted pipes on under the house. At this point we call the landlord like look we can't fix that. He told us he couldn't come till tomorrow around noon. Which puts us at 5 days and counting.

Bad Situation #2
Tuesday Javo and I was going to pick up his check when we smelled the car starting to overheat and it started smoking we made it to his work only to find it needed anti-freeze. Cool I call mom and she runs us down to Wal-Mart I get some anti-freeze and stop leak and think cool we are good to go. WRONG we get down to the gas station and notice its making this weird noise which is the product of the radiator fan being locked up. Managed to get it home and now I gotta pay $60 for the fan IF it's just the fan and then labor.

Bad Situation #3
I do not make a lot of money folks. As a matter of fact I am consider in the poverty range as are a good part of Americans. I work. I pay taxes. I also get HUD housing. I am not ashamed....whatever keeps a roof over my kids heads and keeps them fed. If I didn't have the housing and food stamps I would not be able to support my family. Sorry for you haters. Like I said it's not like I'm not trying. But I pay $85 rent for my home...it ain't much....it's quite old, quite cold, and honestly I could do better even with housing IF I wanted to give up our dogs once of which my son has had since he was a year and a half. Yesterday however I recieved a letter stating coming March 1st I would be paying $550 a month rent. WHAT??? My hours just got cut to 20 hours a week which equals out to $600 per month. Javo works for min wage and gets $576 a month. Together that is $1176....now with rent at $550 our bills per month would total $1148. Do the math pre-baby means $28 left per month. That's one box of diapers. Excuse me folks but my heart just fell to the floor and am trying to appeal that decision.

So that's my week I am beyond frustrated and adding the pregnancy and the pain that just never goes away. I'm just not feeling it.

The happy part? Xay comes home telling me every day how much he likes school and how he has friends. It makes me happy to know he is happy and not playing video games even for just a hour a day. 

Wednesday, January 22, 2014

If I Had of Known....

If I had of known that this pregnancy was going to be so different I might have rethought my excitement over it.

Don't get me wrong I am all excited about the end result but at 6 1/2 months I have had a lot of symptoms that were....not there the first time. Morning sickness, dehydration, colds, nose bleeds, and the newest up is this RUQ (right upper quadrant) pain. Let me be specific it is quite literally at the top of baby bump under my right breast at the bottom of my ribs.

Last week the doctor tested my liver and tomorrow he is sending me to get a RUQ ultrasound to check all the parts that being smashed. Personally the pain feels more like nerve pain to me. A burning stabbing sensation that most of the time hurts at the level of a 7 and then has these random moments of severe pain that rates on the same level of contractions at their worst. And what I got told however? Just deal with it.

Just deal with it? You mean to tell me I have three more months of this pain which will most likely get rough the bigger she gets? I am not a happy mommy.

I can't sleep peacefully and it was something even with the large tummy that I was used to.

So this is me sending out a plea to my daughter....

               Please baby girl I know you are just making yourself comfortable but mommy needs a little
              break from the pain!